As parents, I think we can all agree that the evening time at home can be filled with many tasks; at times those tasks look like chaos. For some families those tasks are: leave work, pick the kids up from school and/or daycare, help kids with homework, wait for significant other to get home from work, prepare, make, and eat dinner, clean the kitchen, get the kids ready for bed, prepare lunches for the next day, etc etc.
You may be a stay home parent, working parent, work from home parent, etc, no matter what your working role is in your family you are an integral piece and so is your significant other. At the end of the day you may feel exhausted, depleted, and down right “over it!” However, since you and our significant other are such key components in keeping the love flowing in the family, it’s important that you find time at the end of your day to connect. Connecting with your spouse can be as simple as making time to have day-to-day conversations with one another.
Here are a few tips on How To Improve Day-To -Day Conversations With Your Significant Other:
1.) Smile when you see your significant other come through the door. As mentioned above the evening can get hectic with all there is to do to get dinner to the table and kids to bed at a decent hour. Sometimes our evenings can be so chaotic that we forget to give our significant other some love when he/she walks through the door. A simple smile to let your significant other know that you see him/her is a warm way to acknowledge their presence and welcome them home.
2.) Stop what you are doing for a minute and greet each other with a hug and/or kiss. Physical touch is a great way to greet your significant other and to reconnect after a long and/or busy day. Physical touch can communicate your love for each other without having to speak too many words.
3.) Look each other in the eyes when asking how each other’s day went and wait for the other to reply. Listen to their reply not to respond, but to truly hear them.
4.) Put your phone away when your spouse enters the room and/or complete your phone call before you arrive home so you’re not walking in the door on the phone. This is to give each other your undivided attention.
5.) Expand the “How was your day?” question a little further. Some great questions to ask:
What was the best part of your day?
What did you have for lunch?
What was the worse part of your day?
Tell me three good things that happened to you today?
Tell me something that you heard or saw that made you feel grateful?
6.) Be as excited as your pets and/or your young children are about seeing your spouse walk through the door. I know it may sound silly, but excitement can be infectious! Show your loved one some excitement and your enthusiasm can light up the entire house. Your excitement about their arrival can instantly add joy in the room and a desire to want to connect with one another immediately.
These are just a few tips to get you started! I’d luv to hear more about your rituals on how you connect and improve daily communication with your significant other. Have a wonderful day and don’t forget to make time for the small things, as the small things build to the big things.
Melissa Dumaz is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over 15 years of experience in psychotherapy. She specializes in guiding clients through the complexities of overcoming emotional and physical trauma. She also helps clients of all ages deal with grief, anxiety, postpartum depression, relationship issues, parenting, transitions in life, family conflict, self-esteem and stress management. Click here to learn more.